1,800 pairs of shoes were displayed at the Washington Monument as part of CureFest, representing the 1,800 children that die from cancer each year. Those shoes held 3,600 feet that once walked or ran or crawled or were carried (babies get cancer too) on this Earth for far too short. They are no longer here but the shoes remain to tell part of their story. Did they walk or did they run? Were they still in the crawling stage or were they an infant, needing to be carried? Did they play in the mud and jump in puddles on a rainy day? Did they doodle on them when they were bored in school? Did they prefer comfort to fashion, or fancy to casual? Were they active or laid back? Or did the shoes just reflect their favorite color or character? Whatever the shoes said about their owner, their personality was reflected in some way. These shoes traveled to hospitals and clinic appointments. Went to schools and back. Provided some sense of freedom when their owner would run in them. These shoes climbed jungle gyms, hiked trails, pedaled bicycles, rode scooters, jumped on trampolines, kicked soccer balls, danced, skipped and galloped. Maybe traveled the world or maybe stayed close to home. Whether they traveled hundreds of miles or just a few, or none at all, these shoes held the feet of 1,800 brave souls who were taken way too soon. These shoes are now still. They sit, unworn, empty. Nothing but a reminder of the lost lives they once adorned.
When I went through Ariella’s things not long after she died, there were some things I just could not part with. Among those items were were two pairs of shoes that were Ariella. Ariella was all about comfort. Sweatpants and oversized hoodies and t-shirts. Perfect with her Uggs. They were cozy and easy to put on and went with everything. Ariella was not a dress and skirt kind of girl. She agreed to wear a dress to a Bat Mitzvah if she could get black Chuck Taylors to wear with it. And she did. And that was Ariella in a nutshell. Often a contradiction but she didn’t take herself too seriously and didn’t care what others thought.
How fitting that the Uggs are in the picture also. The Uggs experienced many adventures with Ariella. The Chuck Taylors not so much but both of those pairs of shoes represent distinctive parts of Ariella’s personality, and I don’t think I will ever part with them. Death changes your perspective of everything. Something seemingly so meaningless as a pair of shoes represents so much more than we would ever consider. As noted above they represent lives lost from cancer. Beautiful souls that were extinguished. They represent the lives that were and the lives that will no longer be. These kids did not grow out of those shoes. They never had the chance.
So well said. It made me stop in my tracks, in my shoes and realize the impact those shoes had on so many lives of those who were left behind after their child died. I had been following a child on Facebook who recently died. She did not have cancer but had lived for 5 1/2 years with half a heart and several other life threatening issues. Her parents were grateful for the time they had with her as she lived much longer than expected, but she was a fighter just like your daughter and loved the life she was given. Now I think about her empty shoes too.
Thank you for continuing to post about your feelings and how you are managing your grief. Keep running in your shoes!!!❤️
Thank you
Thank you for your continued posting, my heart goes out to you.
My son was 24 years old when he was killed in a car accident. The only clothing the hospital returned were his socks and shoes, a pair of Brooks sneakers that he thought were the most comfortable shoes ever. Most of the time he “lived” in his work boots (he was an auto tech). It’s been 311 days since his death – the only thing that has changed in his room from that night is that his keys are back hanging on the shelf where he always kept them and his socks and Brooks are under the chair he would sit on to play his video games, when he wasn’t working 2 jobs or fishing. His boots are next to his closet, which I haven’t touched – one slipper is in the closet, one is outside the closet. Our children died at different ages and different circumstances – both tragic. Hugs to you!
Thank you for sharing
Too many shoes. Breaks my heart. You are such a good writer. I love you <3
Thank you
I so agree, shoes tell a part of the story that is so personal and goes right to the heart 💔 I love Ariella’s outfit with her black converse 🌟🖤🌟 Campbell’s fav red rubber boots sit right at my front door & I find sometimes people move them like someone forgot to put them away but that’s were I need them. Shes always home in my ❤️ I carried her Star Wars crocs in DC all weekend ✨ she loved to bring croc buttons to the hospital for her fav surgery nurse to pass out to other kids 🦄 At the foot of her bed her shoes are lined up as she left them, each pair brings a story to my eyes, I think they will stay that way for a while. Thanks Erica, xo
The shoes remind me of the bin of shoes on display at the Holocaust Museum – both representing the death of innocent children by a monster. I hate this.