Numbers, Psychics, and Mediums, Oh My

I was hesitant to blog about this. The idea of spirits communicating through mediums is quite polarizing. There are those that believe without a doubt that there is an afterlife and that their loved ones send signs and are able to communicate through mediums. There are those that believe in the afterlife but don’t believe spirits communicate through mediums. And others that believe without a doubt that once we die, that is it. The signs we see are coincidences, nothing more. And that mediums are scammers, just excellent at reading body language. There are also those that fall in the middle, like me, not quite sure what to believe. Before Ariella died I never thought an afterlife was possible. But a grieving parent will look for any hope that they will see their child again. And the hope that their child was not cheated. That though their life here on Earth was short, that wasn’t it for them. They still get to “live”, just not in the same way (though they are cheated, there are so many earthly experiences they miss out on). After Ariella died I remained skeptical but was more open to the possibility that she was communicating by sending signs. Large, bright colored butterflies were in abundance this summer. Would they have been there anyway? I don’t ever remember seeing so many noticeable butterflies. Are the rainbows really sent by her? I definitely have never before seen so many rainbows as I have since May. The things I have mentioned in my previous posts, even those that seemed outlandish (purple elephant, blue lizard); signs, or coincidences? The deer that just hangs out nearby, that doesn’t run away when we approach. A sign? Or just a deer that has finally gotten used to being around people. Now if the deer was a unicorn, that would be definite sign. I have received every sign I have asked for but I don’t know that I will ever be fully convinced.

But then I went to see a medium. It was booked for Friday the 13, also the night of a full moon. Definite sign. Ariella loved the spooky, the creepy. She most certainly would have chosen the spookiest day of the year. If Ariella was going to show up, it was going to be that night. A friend of mine took me and she sat in the session as an observer. She did her research and chose someone highly recommended. I did not book the appointment so the medium truly knew nothing about me, not even my name. She did not know why I was there.

She started with numerology and a life path card reading. I won’t go into details as this was not the reason for the visit but I will say the numbers and cards were accurate to me. Something that did stand out was my role as a caregiver and she emphasized that this is the year that I need to take care of myself and put my own needs first. Remember, she knew nothing about why I was there.

Then the spirits supposedly arrived. She warned us ahead of time that often others, like grandparents, will come through to say hi, even if that’s not who we are there to speak with and even if we never knew them in life. I will admit, initially it did feel like she was fishing. According to the medium, David’s relatives were coming through (they wanted to say hi to the one who is really into music, which does describe David) but really I couldn’t verify any of it. So who knows? There are some things that can be verified but I haven’t bothered to go beyond David to try. I wasn’t there to hear from them and I would know soon if it was all really a scam. They did say happy anniversary to us. Our anniversary was just 4 days prior to this reading.

Next it was my relatives coming through. I still felt like there was fishing and guessing/correction going on, though she did get some things correct about my grandparents that would have been very random guesses. And again several things I couldn’t verify because I just don’t know. I wrote it all down though and may try to verify with my family. Though she got some things right I wasn’t impressed, and of course by this point I’m getting frustrated because I haven’t heard from the only person I cared to hear from (well also my dad, will get to that later) and I’m thinking my friend just wasted her money.

The next person to come through was a female who loved games and puzzles. The medium asked if that meant anything to me. I told her it did and she asked who, but I would not tell her. Ariella needed to come through on her own. I was not going to help the medium along. She stuck with the games and said this person really liked her games (we had game night every week) and she got the sense she died recently, less than a year ago, and that she was someone younger. So yes, she could have guessed age and whatnot based on who we already talked about, but the game thing? The medium realized Ariella was my daughter and asked if she had a lung problem (her cause of death). She said she saw Ariella playing with something stringy which makes complete sense to me. Ariella loved silly string, spraying her doctors, friends, and even her teacher with it any chance she got. In fact one of her last pranks was in the hospital with the silly string. The medium said she had a horse over there, or maybe it was a unicorn. That unicorns were very important to her. Ok, yes, horses and unicorns are popular with young girls. So maybe a good guess. But my friend pointed out that just a couple days earlier David had shared a memory of him and Ariella walking through the hospital with unicorn horns on. People wore unicorn horns to her funeral. They were a big deal to her. She knew I put a unicorn in her room.

This next thing though, is what got me. According to the medium, in Ariella’s words, she is honored about all the money that has been raised in her honor to help others in similar situations. That she knows it is difficult for us to continue to do it but she is happy we are because it helps others and that is what we are here to do. When I talk to Ariella, I have told her many times how hard it is to continue with Ari’s Bears without her. The medium completely got Ariella’s giving nature, that she cared more about helping others.

Some other things that also made total sense. She mentioned moving furniture. We redid Ariella’s room when she was in the hospital. Furniture was moved out and back in, slightly rearranged and her room was painted. She knew about her fingerprint that I wear as a necklace along with the necklace she bought me. She knew I got rid of a lot of her things but kept her wig and 2 pairs of her shoes. She sent a lightning bolt which also made perfect sense to me given Ariella’s love of Harry Potter. In fact her plan was to be Harry Potter for Halloween this year (she loved Halloween and planned her costumes way in advance, last year she was Hermione). And her love of swimming came through.

It gets more surreal though. We were wrapping up, Ariella had left, the spirits were supposedly gone, and we were talking about a prediction for a question I asked (will let you know later if it comes true ) when all of a sudden the medium asked if I am connected to a male that loves sports, especially baseball and football. And there was my dad. He emphasized that he is a big baseball fan, (a big part of my childhood was going to games with him) and is also a football fan. He said to tell me that he is here and that Ariella is with him. This was crazy to me. I was a little salty that I didn’t have more time with him but then it hit me that earlier that day I talked to both Ariella and my father, asking them to meet me. I told my dad though that while I would love for him to say hi, I wanted to spend most of the time with Ariella. And he listened. He hung back (let all the other crazy relatives through, lol) and when he realized it was ending jumped in to make sure I knew he was there. That right there was just insane to me. Our time was up, the medium was shutting it down and in comes my dad described to a t.

All this to say, it seemed pretty real. Well some of it. I would try again, but maybe with a different medium. The things that she got right, she got right. A lot of it was quite accurate and things she would have no way of knowing. A lot I couldn’t verify but I will be interested to see if any of the stuff with the other relatives does pan out.

I imagine there are plenty that believe, and plenty that think I am delusional. That I am a sucker, willing to believe anything. Which is why I wasn’t so sure I would share about it. But I ultimately decided to share this because this is life after child loss. This is my life after child loss. This is me, trying to get by, trying to find some, any comfort. This is a common road grieving parents take. Bereaved parents are in the majority of those who seek the services of a medium. In fact, a retreat we were considering attending offers the services of a medium as part of their programming for those who wish to partake. Is it real? Is it all a big hoax? Does it really matter if it brings some comfort and peace to the grieving parent. Ok, it does matter a little because they are plenty of scammers out there preying on the vulnerable. Maybe all mediums are scammers. I don’t think so. But I would approach searching for a medium the same way you find any service. Do your research, read reviews, and find someone certified (yes you can be certified to be a medium, who knew?). Stay anonymous so they can’t research you prior to the visit. Give nothing away during your reading, and keep an open mind.